Tuesday, August 21, 2007

The wonder that is childhood

I recently saw this kid on a bus journey. A very pretty, active child, around 6 years old. She was jumping up and down on the seats, singing some very popular movie song loudly - chanting the same line over and over again actually. She was proving to be too much to handle for her parents. They obviously did not want her yelling and jumping to disturb the other people in the bus. They were even embarrassed maybe. But there was no holding this kid down. She was in high spirits and no one could stop her from having a good time. After a while of trying to quiet her, the parents gave up and dosed off.
Travelling alone is a blessing, but it also means you have to be at your creative best to keep from getting bored to death. The weather was stifling and so my brain felt duller than ever. After a while of looking out the window, I started looking at the bright antics of this cute kid. She was so full of life and I was happy that she was there. After a while of being ignored by her parents - she turned around and looked at me.
There I was - quite an evil-looking stranger, what with my heavy eyelids and ugly hair-do. She looked at me for a while. Now, I had been used to being this unnoticed, admiring watcher. It so happens with adults, that if they for some reason have been looking at somebody and are caught in the act by the object of their attention, their immediate reaction would be to look embarrassed and turn away. But here I was looking at an innocent kid. I was embarrassed nevertheless because of her deep, penetrating(so it seemed) look. I wanted to turn away, but couldn't. Then, suddenly she smiled at me.
Here I was, locked up in my own world of silly worries. I had just forgotten to look at the best things of life. Stupidly thinking that I was the centre of the universe. I had stopped enjoying things that had made my childhood that extremely wonderful part of my life - the reason that I am what I am today. Laughter, wonder, curiosity, innocence, openness, unconditional love, courage to ask and learn. The simple smile.
I slowly returned the smile. I was shocked at how difficult it had been for me to return this simple gesture. How closed my world was becoming. How absorbed I was with myself. Worrying every second about what somebody would think of my actions. "Everything you do in your life is to get attention." How true. And how disheartening. There is definitely more to life than some body's attention. Like that smile.
I promised myself that was not going to lose my brain to the mundane world of adults - the so-called practical thoughts of how to make more money, how to save it, how to make a great career and what-not, living like a vegetable in short.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

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